Many of us get the heebie-geebies when it comes to receiving money for our gifts. And now we have another reason for getting the ickies with PayPal. Here are some alternatives.

As women, our blocks to receiving often come with associations of slimy salesmen and businessmen. Greed. Corruption. We feel guilty for participating in such a system.

Many of us have developed quite an aversion to the whole transaction process when it comes to asking for or charging our at our value.
And then the news comes along to confirm that yucky feeling about money.

We’ve heard the reports that Peter Thiel, co-founder of PayPal, will be donating $1.25 million to Donald Trump’s campaign through the Super PACS.

Great. Just what we need. More reason to recoil from the whole money thing and feel even more revulsed.

Yet we fempreneurs have a chance to change this narrative by using our voices to design a new economy.

We can actually shift an outdated model that puts money in the hands of those looking to obtain the biggest share of the scarcity – typically those who are high on the socio-economic hierarchy.

And we can do this by looking at the ritual of transaction as a means to creating more shared abundance rather than grabbing part of the scarcity.

We can actually shift the money narrative away from the grip of the “Alpha Male” into place it into Divine Masculine and Feminine hands.

And we can start by changing our own narratives in four steps:

  1.  First and foremost getting clear on what you want and your WHY – your big vision for you but also the world. The values you choose to operate in. And above all, the value you can bring to the world.
  2. Clearing your blocks around receiving.
  3. Developing a relationship with your money flow so you are clear about what is coming in and going out in your life and business – the where and the why. Own that you are the one deciding on that flow – choosing what supports your vision and releasing what does not.
  4. Opening up the right channels for receiving – and giving. Channels that align with your big, bold vision of the world. This includes taking choices about your channels for transactions, as well as where you can start giving regularly in alignment with your vision.

Back to PayPal: thanks to Thiel’s latest “investment”, I have seen several FB posts asking for PayPal alternatives. This is a beautiful example of taking such choices in alignment with your values. 

Shifting away from PayPal, however, will not hit Thiel in his wallet where it hurts. He sold his shares to eBay in 2002.

At best, it may put pressure on PayPal to take distance and send a message to Thiel that we would rather not use the platforms he invests in.

However, his investments have been vast and have included Facebook, LinkedIn, Asana, Stripe and Quora.

You can read more about Thiel & his investments here.

Lastly, I can only cut and paste from Luvvie Ajayi when it comes to hitting Thiel where it hurts:


But there is a more prevalent argument for not using PayPal: they operate with a scarcity model – one that uses hidden fees, a lack of transparency, the sudden freezing of accounts, and undedicated support. 

We all know that PayPal (and particularly makes the transaction super easy – create a link on the spot and send or copy paste into a “pay now” button. It makes the transaction quick and easy and initially feels abundant.

However, what you may not know is that PayPal is not your friend as a seller or service vendor for a few reasons:

1. Confusing, unclear and non-transparent fees. It is always a gamble how much will actually end up in you account after a transaction. They have their basic fees listed and if you really dig through the charges and rates you might get an idea. But they are hard to find and hard to calculate.

2. A lack of seller protection, especially for service-oriented businesses. With PayPal, the buyer can open up a claim that they did not receive products or services or that these were not provided or delivered as agreed.

You can argue it, and if you sell a product you may be partially covered by a special seller’s insurance, but PayPal ultimately has the final say. Most of the time they side with a buyer. Especially if it is a digital product.

If you sold a service, you have no insurance and PayPal most of the time will not side with you. Even if they do, a client can still open a chargeback through their Credit Card company and PayPal are very unwilling to fight them.

Further, in the EU, they operate by UK rules and only accept a check as proof that you have returned funds to a buyer outside of the PayPal platform. In countries like the Netherlands, they do not use checks but bank statements. PayPal does not count that as evidence, nor an email from a buyer admitting they have received a refund.

So what happens? Basically any buyer can pay for a product or service and claim they never received it and most likely PayPal will rule on their side. Even with evidence of delivery and repayment if that payment did not go through PayPal itself.

3. Freezing of accounts when there is a sudden spike of incoming funds. You have a campaign, your sales increase, all the hard work is paying off and then… suddenly your account is frozen for 180 days because that is how long it takes for chargebacks to clear. There is no dedicated account manager to help you.

So what are the alternatives? 

Fortunately, I have created a list of the solutions I have used and their pros and cons.

Below are some examples and options for you to consider and set up NOW – especially when you do not have a full website.

1. Direct invoicing.

PROS: This option is the easiest if your clients are local. It involves local bank transactions and the least amount of fees are taken out of the payment.

You can opt to simply send an (automated) email with your business name and address, bank account details, and VAT/Chamber of Commerce business number when someone signs up.

Here in the Netherlands, I often use an invoicing tool, which includes a pay now button and several options for direct payment, from direct debit, transfer, paypal, credit cards.

CONS: Transaction process might be delayed as you and/or your client search for bank details and if you need to fill out the details in the invoice – and you risk losing momentum from your client and yourself. You can counter this somewhat by having all information from your side available in a pre-designed invoice template.

The longer it takes for someone to complete the process, the higher the chance they will delay, forget or backtrack on their decision (often due to their own blocks).

And the more time and effort you need to take to follow up on it – which means the more opportunity for YOUR blocks to take over and to get you freezing and inactive about it.

2. A Quick Link added to your BUY NOW button or a hyperlink in a text or image.

PAYPAL: The “easiest” and most common way to set this up is through a payment system like Paypal or With regular PayPal you can connect to standard paypal system. With you simply have a link with the exact amount and they pay directly and receive a paypal invoice thereafter.

PRO: Simple, safe and easy to set up and most people have a PayPal account.

CONS: Non-transparent fees, which can be surprisingly high. Also, as a service you do not get insured and people can easily ask for chargebacks/returned payments. Paypal often sides in favour of the buyer even when you have evidence you provided the service and you have a no refund policy in place.

Also is not available in certain countries such as Ireland.

STRIPE: Stripe is a common alternative to PayPal.

PROS: More transparent fees, better protection.

CONS: Can be confusing to set up – best left to a developer unless it is included in another service.

MOLLIE (in the Netherlands and Belgium): is my favourite as it also generates a quick link and gives the customer/client a choice between direct bank transfer, iDeal (a Dutch direct debit tool), PayPal, Credit Card and many other options.

PROS: A broad selection of payment options. Transparent fees. Ease of use for buyer and seller.

CONS: Needs about a week to set up as you have to upload your business information and get approval. In Dutch. Transaction fees from Mollie added on top of transaction fees on other tools such as Paypal. Payments sent out only on Fridays if not direct bank transfer.

Transferwise: Another option for inter-currency payments is something like

This tool allows you to make bank transfers at very low fees below the normal brank transfer and currency exchange rates. In some countries you can generate a payment link, but you can just send a direct email and the customer fills int the rest.

PROS: Low fees, easy to set up.

CONS: Relies on client filling out form. Only international currency transfers and the link option is not available in all countries.

3. www.acuityscheduling.comThis is an online scheduler that I can not recommend highly enough. People can sign up for a group event and you can include Stripe, Square and (and yes, PayPal) as payment options. You can send automated emails when they sign up and it leaves much of the admin to the tool and the customer.

PROS: Easy to set up, can simply use a link to sign up and pay. There is a limited free version and a 14 day free trial. EXCELLENT customer service. Has integrated tools like automated mails, payment systems, questionnaire forms. Can integrate in a website with paid versions.

CONS: Regular monthly fees are between $10-34 a month.

5. This all-in-one option is probably the best, simplest and easiest option when you are first starting out and do not have a website – because it provides both a one-page event listing option, where people can sign up, alerts and mails, and payment system in one package.

PROS: All in one, easy tool to set up.

CONS: Free for free events, can charge around €2.50 per ticket sale (as of July 2016), but may have special deals going on with lower fees.

6. Point of sale.
Another option is a direct POS (point of sale) card-swiping payment tool like (which also has as online option) if you think you will be using it often for workshops and services. However, keep in mind these come with hefty subscription fees.

NOTE: Almost all of these have fees involved so just incorporate that in your rate. It is part of doing business.

But more importantly, the most important way you can open up the channels to receiving is to heal and reframe your money narrative.

I have been hearing a lot from entrepreneurs from all over the world about unsure they feel about the future of their businesses.

Marketing techniques aren’t working, sales are down, industries are changing — as women we are more affected and most emotionally open to feeling the instability.

Luckily, Denise Duffield Thomas of the Lucky B Money Bootcamp is offering TWO FREE LIVE TRAININGS on this very issue – there will be a collective clearing and MINDSET RESET so we can all let it go and get energetically ready for a new 2017.

This will be lots of live energy clearing and block busting and I would love you and your tribe to be part of it.

Mindset Reset and Collective Clearing.
Time to let it go and start again for an awesome 2017.

6pm Eastern Wednesday 19 October

(3pm Pacific / 11pm London / 12 pm Amsterdam/ 9am Thursday Sydney)

Sign up here.

I personally have gone through her bootcamp and it really was both life and business-changing for me.

As her program is lifetime access, I return to it consistently for community support and accountability and repeat her program every time I enter a shift.

Denise has not offered a live training in years, but I know this one will be very powerful.

Align your story – and powerfully transform your receiving narrative.



Are you ready to align with your right to receive for how you enrich the world?

Are you ready to co-create the next chapter of your success with the Universe?

To invoke the power of Story Alignment?

I sure am.

Using powerful coaching techniques, playful and insightful exercises, and my talent for words, messages and story, together we will:

  • Dive into your present, past and ancestral story to give your gifts, purpose and talents context and confirmation.
  • Explore your dreams and vision to gain clarity on where you want to be and set the intention to go there.
  • Understand who you best serve, how and why so you can powerfully reach the right people with a message that speaks right to their hearts and minds.
  • Formulate a magnetising core message & story that will easily inspire more action, creation and clarity.
  • Open up to receiving amazing and unexpected deliverables, directly from the Universe, that just fall into beautifully place.

Apply for the Little Big Mouth Story Alignment intensive today.

Ready to change your narrative?


Sign up for the 
"Change the Narrative"
virtual challenge. 

Start with a guided activation
& begin writing your success story. 

The pen to changing the world
is in your hands,
starting now.

You are in! Keep your eyes out for a confirmation mail from: <--White list me and save me from your spam folder :) Get ready to Change the Narrative on Thursday, July 13th at 2:00 PM/14:00 CEST. More details here:

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